I think, doa i really powerful weapon that can makes ur life calm, and smooth. Here, today, something happen. But so far, i feel at ease. I wonder why don't i feel panic or maybe scared or what. It just smooth and i don't really feel tense.
on kbi welcoming days for scholars.
Ok, i will story what is going on from the very beginning of the day. Today i woke up bit late. Mentang2 uzur, so i tend to make my sleep time longer. What the heck is, i've 'overdream'. usually, it's hard for me to get dream or to dreaming in my sleep. usually, my sleep will just nothing at all. no dream and no sweat. i have a very cool sleep and usually i will tido mati. i dont realize anything happen. coz, everytime i boom to my pillow, anything can be fogotten. but today and last night was slightly different. and u know what, i got a dream about my friend got engaged! And she is Izlina! But the unique thing is, her mother not Isma. Not her mother that i knew her mother. her mother in my dream was different person. Interestingly, she got engaged with the one that i know..haha...klaka..but then, it is like, i like that guy, but she the one that engaged with that guy! funny but sedih..haha...in the dream, i'm shock that my friend that engaged with the guy, not me. and some more, the events happen in front of my eyes, and she show me the engaged ring. hmm..actually, i dont really see izlina in my dream. it is like,
somebody that close to me but i'm not pretty sure who.it is just like somebody that close to me just like me and izlina. but i dont think izlina is in my dream. whatever it is..it is just a dream..it's quite interesting to have dream in ur sleep. and another weird dream was, i heard sombody's voice. it's like his voice. i don't know why he came to my dream. maybe i think too much. i just hope i can stop thinking and dreamin bout that and focus with my studies!nevermind, i need to give my self time to try to forget the past and move on and strive toward the big dream which is going to Canada especially Toronto! After that, i can dream what ever i want. Ok. Qurratul?DEal! One year is just short. So. i must use the time wisely.
SO, today on the bus, i've read doa pagi and i read ma'thurat after get out from the bus. I read it in the crowd that are boistorous. noisy with people talking, i do feel is it ok for me to read ma'thurat in the crowd but then, i just finish up my ma'thurat. i dont want to care about others. as this what i've do everyday, so i wont stop just because people . but i maybe i still could say that, the place no really good to read it but i think it doesnt matter with place. of course the most suitable and afdhol place to zikir is when u r in quiet place which u can concentrate more, but then, i know, if i dont do at the time it is, i know i wont do it for other time. so, i think, to zikir, can be to anyplace and anywhere. bukan dosa pun..
hmm..tapi bukan Allah ada janji ke, kalau kita Ingat Dia depan khalayak ramai, Dia akan ingat n sebut nama kita dpn khalayak ramai yang lebih baik. I dont know, that i what i've heard..
In the motivational talk from MR. Adnan, he said, it's not a good sleep if you don't dream. I just laugh to myself..this was not my fist time have dream in my sleep, but this one quite funny one and somemore, related to my life. but still i feel happy to have this dream because i wish that was just a dream and wont be true! If true, maybe i need some time to accept it..how come my best friend get engaged with the guy the one that i mean..haha..funny lorr..but interesting. i dont know, how it can be a dream in my sleep! Really, i'm the one that hard to get dream in sleep. but once i got dream, sometimes it really nonsense.
Then, at the end of the session, i've found somebody. when the oversea students took the gift from the organizer, i found a name that i am familiar which is Muhammad Imran Mustafa. Hmm..at first, i just capture his name, Imran. but then, as far as i see..this guy looks familiar from me..Oh..then i remember, he is the one that i've chatted for a long time. Imakubex in iluvislam..hua3...here he is! looks more real eh..i just cant believe this..and what's more i cant believe is, i've went to him and ask for clarification...Oh i really i cant believe that i've did it..i just said to him, " I think i know you,.you are imakubex right?" and he said, Yes.
aand then, i cabut!! haha...i know, i dont know what else to say.. i just feel really shame and shy. i dont know, i supposed to tegur him or not. but i dont know how can i do this..it is just feel like i want him to know, i'm the one that he had chat before. but then, because i'm too shy, and he was not so friendly at the first moment, and dont feel like " where she know me? or maybe he should asked, where did i know..? but then he did nothing..then i just cabut la...segan gilerr...
Nevermind, we talk later. not really big deal hre.Just now in college, i've missed the bus! Haha..u know what, i've went to the bank to draw money because i want to pay the fee. I don't want to postpone anymore, because mama keep asking and dah bising to me, y i tangguh2..i hate to hear those thing, and makes me feel i need to settle it down as soon as possible. so, as i've saw the office open, and today is SUNDAY, it is great opportunity. coz, i hate to use the break time, and just go to the bank to settle down paying my fee. i feel like wasting my time for that. so, i've went to the bank, and draw RM700. this was my first time, went to the bank and draw from the ATM Machine. Unfortunately, i can't use the machine to bank-in to Taylor's College. No Choice, i need to draw cash RM700 and pay to the cashier counter in the office.
Before, i reach the college, i've went to the carrefour express shop. oh man! I really can't tahan to buy groceries. the thing that i need. I buy so many things, and of course it is food! I don't know what is going to happen to me, if everyday i need to eat MAGGI to save my money! huhu..too bad. i'm the one that could be too selfish. I can stand eat maggi everyday as long i can keep my money. i'm the one that can do anything regardless if i think i want to do it. If i said, i wan to save my money, that i will do whatever it takes. and the simples way is by fasting everyday. but currently, i can't. Back to the topic, the groceries i've bought almost cost RM15.60.
WHat i've bought?SO many things like, roti, kaya, peanuts, and all food that i want. find the cheap and the nutrious. Next, when i reach the college i've missed the bus. Luckily there is a sister that want to send me back to Casa. If not, maybe i need to take a cab or bus. anothter test was, when we just want to reach Casa, one of the comunitee called her, said that i've missed my keys. Oh...how could it be.. another test on my, but i dont feel any tense of panic. i still can smile warmly, haha..and alhamdulillah everything i can say, goes smoothly..always has somebody that want to help me and i've met with people that helpful . the one that helped me out known as Kak Lyn. She said, "next time, u need to be more responsible and tanggunjawab to diri sendiri, to ur self.."
and then, for the keys that i've missed, there is one brother that send to me by his motor bike. he just cool and he said to me " Lainkali jangan buat lagi.."
hehe..i found it, he said with the cute way. the intonation so cute..well, of course i dont want to make trouble anytmore. this is not what i want. tak dipinta pun utk sume ni berlaku. well, good lesson for me..but i dont really feel like a lesson..hua3..
Anyway, Thanks to Allah the Almighty that makes my life easier and smooth although there are few trouble that interverne still i dont be afraid or feel lost. Because Allah is always there for me!