Rabu, Mac 28


"Having somewhere to go is HOME,
having SOMEONE to love is FAMILY.
Having both is a blessing! 
 I am grateful to have and to know a person like her.
and I do not expect she is the person who really care about me. 
Truly it is a blessing.

Someone that show how much they care,
truly it is something priceless.

as a saying says,
“People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care”

Truly I am touched.

In a very hectic time where everyone busy with themselves, we will never know a person really care about us until they really prove that they really really care. Truly even the close one might fail in the test of proving and act upon it. It is not about being judgmental on who care about us, and who is not. But, it is something interesting to see who are real and true and who are not. Yet, this self-assessment give me some direction on who are 'filtered', who one that I knew for real and true. But it is not fair to 'pukul sama rata'. Well, it's not about them, it just about myself. Plus, I knew the basic thing, Allah is my caretaker. Allah care for me all the time. Isn't Allah is enough for me, when no one might not even care about myself, or even myself start on losing to have the sense to really care of myself. But indeed, Allah's love and mercy never stop on making me impress when I try to reflect and contemplate.

I am touched with people surround me, even so in a very hectic life, they still have the sense to show how much they really care me. The personal assessment are something interesting, useful and insighful. Now I knew for real, not many people really care about us. We might have thousands of friends and sisters, but specifically those that really truly care might be too little and can be count. This is not a disappointment since there is no point to be disappointment that just lead to another problem. Also, I have no right to judge anyone. I have to make good assumptions that their situation as well make them unable to care and need help. My point here, it is the time for me to be real and eliminate assumptions, and limit the expectations. Expect nothing from other people to avoid frustrations and disappointment in later time and expect the most from your own self. Even the one that seems very close to us, no guarantee will be the person that care so much about ourselves. It can be disappointing to see that to happen, but it is not practical to be disappointing by little things. It's not worth it. It just that right now, when I took a step back, having sometime for myself, that I knew and value the value of  being caring and sensitive towards people surround. It can be so hurt when the one that close to you might care but its not shown, the same as the reality in this world which something for us to think about. It is truly a hurt and painful feeling.  I don't care how much you know you should care but I care how much you really care. But questioning oneself, have I really show how much I care to other people? It is simple to pointing finger direct to our ownself since we knew we can change while other people can never be expected to change in a split second or in single night to behave the way  that we want them to behave. We just need to accept people the way they are. On the other side, there are people are suffering for hunger, injustice, oppressions, but how much we really SHOW our care? yes we might care, we might remember them in our prayer, but they might not know we are care enough until we do something to prove it. The same thing in my case and personal experience. This experience had motivates me on being more sensitive to care more about other people's feeling more than my own feeling since hurting someone and somebody will just give you a double hard feeling and it's like hurting and torturing your own body.
May Allah grant strength for my brothers and sisters who are suffering just because people surround him/her doesn't show how much they care.
 May Allah forgive me for not being being careful in my words, for not being careful in my act and for not caring about others more than myself and care about this deen more than anything else!

a take home message from the GPS talk,
  say, "I Love you!"
it's not what, 
it's not when
it's not where
I love you the way you are.

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