As I have pay for it

aduhh..dilema betul r
residence oh residence..
duit da bayar.
nak tunggu tak nak tunggu?
i'm the one that goin to face it not others
can't i make my own decision?
coz i'm the one that goin to live in with that choice

i knew i need to refer my parent
and believe me they will think about money
money that I have paid

and because of money i am stuck!

i knew it cost a lot. almost a thousand(if in ringgit)
its not a cheap one. bukan satu dua ringgit
but to value back

life there is not like here
i need at least someone that i can refer to
i believe to live with a senior can be a good thing
as experience is so worth it

how could I choose and make a decision in less than 24 hours
between me and my parents
between me and my life
between me and MONEY!

I can just proceed without considering money
but it's hard to proceed when my parent not favor it
i'm like 'divideable'..

thinking again, my value not on money
one thing that i can sure to have it
at least if i can be with the senior
i already sure i will live with a muslim
and can pray jemaah with her
that's good enough for me.

Talking to mama, she asked me to wait for the residence.
Talking to my sis, the same thing it goes. she said, since I have pay for it.
Talking to abah? I sure he will said the same thing.

and the money is non-refundable.
if it is refundable, then it will not be a problem.

yet, still bothering me to make a decision

ya Allah..please help me to help myself ~_~

*******
1400PM

ikut je la cakap mama
walau kehendak aku berbeza
tapi mungkin ada keberkatan bila ada restu
supaya nanti hati pun tak bercelaru
i don't know what can be in future
so much uncertain things
but I have to believe that there must be a hikmah
why Allah put me in this situation
why Allah give me this PROBLEM
testing my inward


being a waiter
i always used to be a waiter
i'm going to wait for something better
may the BEST will be mine
as I have 'pay' for it

amin.

***************

baru lepas cakap dengan mama n baru lepas solat. mama suruh tunggu. aku cakap, ada kebarangkalian dia campak bagi tempat jauh sebab sekarang tempat kat vic dah penuh. mama cakap, "mana tau kalau ada rezeki. ada orang nak keluar ke.."bila mama cakap macam tu, ingatkan aku macam suatu situasi dulu. izlina dulu pun cakap kat aku macam tu masa aku belum dapat fly. Dia kata, "kalau ada rezeki, adela..". cair aku dengar. huhu. sepatah tu je cukup buat jantung aku bergetar seketika. mengingatkan aku untuk berpegang, bergantunglah dekat Dia. sebab Dia yang pegang segala-galanya. baiklah.

Have FAITH in Him!

benda nampak small matter. just either yes and no. and you can't choose to be in between. when it come to choose it. so much things should be consider. sampai kadang2 terlupa untuk letakkan setinggi pengharapan pada Dia. itulah namanya ujian..

by having faith in Him, I believe He will give the best for me. Thinking to get the best thing from Him, and have the best .