metafora "cinta"

sudah lama
diri ini tak bermadah pujangga
namun semalam hati mahu berkata-kata
semoga kata-kata ini berbicara
kepada mereka yang mendamba

saat engkau mengenal cinta
kemudian terjatuh cinta
seterusnya mula mengejar cinta
perhatikanlah cinta di dalam jiwa
apakah engkau hamba cinta
atau hamba Pencipta?

cinta seharusnya
memerdeka jiwa
bukan memenjara
jauh sekali mengurung rasa

kerana cinta
mencetus bahagia
indah terasa

kerana cinta
menggugah jiwa
kekuatan terbina
untuk terus berusaha

walau hakikat tidak seindah rupa
namun cinta mengubah segalanya

andai cinta
engkau harap balasnya
mungkinkah benar itu cinta?

andai engkau diterima cinta
itu kurnia-Nya
tanda perkenan Pemilik cinta
sudah tiba masanya
untuk cinta itu dibaja
di daerah yang berbeza

andai engkau ditolak cinta
itu ujian dari-Nya
untuk menyucimu dari noda
untuk dikau kembali meneliti cinta
perhalusi ertinya
perbaharui nilainya
perkasakan budinya
dengan sepenuh jiwa

dan seharusnya
cukup sekadar engkau mencinta
tanpa mengharap balasnya
pasti tidak mengundang kecewa
yang ada hanyalah bahagia
kerana engkau hanyalah seorang hamba
jua kerana cintamu bukan cinta biasa
cintamu memerdeka jiwa
dari hamba kepada cinta
menjadi hamba kepada Pencipta

dan jua kerana cintamu cinta istimewa
mencinta sebagai seorang hamba
untuk meraih redha-Nya
dan Dia Maha berkuasa
atas segala-galanya

Allahu'alam.

Januari 23, 2013
Abrar baytuna
Toronto, Canada.

23th birthday

Bismillah ..

Dear myself,

23 years ago you were born on this beautiful day by a strong woman who carried you in her belly to wherever she goes for 9 months. You were delivered to this world by the grace of Allah.

When you were a baby, the only thing you knew were getting feeded, had a good sleep either days or nights. You cried for attentions and pleasures. Any discomfort will make you cranky.

When you were kids, you had no idea on limitation. You learn to walk and get stumbled. You learn to get up and fall again. But nothing can stop you from keep walking. That's the way you learn how to walk with your two little feets.

When you getting older, you learn to run. You keep running until the finish line. You never quit in competition. You were determined with what you believe in yourself. No matter how much you had failed, you still believe you will make it somehow. You set your target as high as the stars in sky. Even so you never reached the sky, you keep your head up high. Knowing that, nothing can stop you if He wills and if you really want it. And you know what you really want. You believe in Him and in all your dreams.

and today, He places you in different part of the world. A place that has different expectations on you, people that treats you differently from the way you were treated, different atmosphere and different ideas on life.

You see beautiful things surround you, beautiful people as well beautiful meaning of this life. You feel the beauty by His grace. Experiences are the best teacher. He blessed you with life lessons along the journey. He wants you to learn about yourself and your Creator. Having total reliance in Him.

This life is beautiful.
When you are grateful.
Beautify your heart and soul.

This life is precious.
Embrace it to the fullest.

This life is priceless.
Appreciate what you have.

This life is wonderful.
When you believe The Most Merciful.

This life has a purpose.
Fulfill your purpose of life
As the way He wants you to live

You are here,
Because He wants you so.

• "I am yours and you are mine" •

happy 23th birthday.

best,
yourself

4:44pm
Sidney Smith
May 22, 2013.

movingforward

Bismillah

Today is my second psychology class of my 4th year undergraduate in Canada.

One of the lessons talked about depression.
People are usually depressed when they are lonely.
When they experienced social withdraw, live in their 'cave' and disengaged with real people.

sometimes you can't deny
you might feel lonely and alone
when you don't really have someone to talk to
but even if you do, you don't feel to talk to them.
or they are just someone you can't talk with.
or maybe you can't find someone
that you can share something deep and personal
or maybe they are just someone you find hard to accept
and you are stuck

acceptance
something that come from your heart
heart can be hurt
once, twice, and losing counts

sometimes it hurts
because for your own stupidity
because of your own choice
and your rusty jahiliyyah

what you are now
are the consequence of the past
and what you are in future
depends on what you are now

the past can be forgiven
but its hard to forget

how I wish
I can buried all the bad memories
that makes me feel so stupid
since they were ignorance

1221a
~healing~